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Your opinion plz. Known or Anon?

Thu Apr 5, 2012, 6:29 AM


Hi guys!

I've been thinking about starting a vlog recently but there is one thing that's always bothered me and that's whether or not to identify myself. I know it sounds silly but because of fanfics like 'As You Are' (okay nothing really happens, but the pairing is still male x male) or doodles that I enjoy making but am generally not proud of (anime or nudes, etc), I'm not sure if I want people to recognize me, or even worse for family members to recognize me, especially those I don't get along with.

So what do you think? If you were in my shoes, would you make your idenitity known and tell family and friends that this is part of who you are, or keep two different profiles?

Thanks for your thoughts! :heart:

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  • Reading: a special someone's messages
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:iconjorainyx:
JoraiNyx Featured By Owner Apr 17, 2012  Student Digital Artist
I think you should go ahead and do it. It's unlikely they'll stumble upon your content unless you link them to it. Besides, if it's family members you do not like then what does it matter what they think anyway? It's not like they can spank you or anything....or can they? lol Just be you and do what you want.
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:iconoinari-hime:
Oinari-Hime Featured By Owner Apr 18, 2012  Professional Digital Artist
lol I understand what you're saying, but I think since writing this journal, part of me has also decided to throw away that old self in any case. I don't want to live two lives or have any further complications, and some of the artists I admire and enjoy the most are artists who are open about themselves, their lives, and who they are. So yes, once I've sorted things out, I certainly plan on ditching the anon status :D Thank you for the support! ♥
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:iconsrsmith:
SRSmith Featured By Owner Apr 17, 2012   Writer
If doing what you do out in the open will result in you changing what you do so as to not offend people you know won't approve, then you have to ask yourself which is more important, keeping people happy or having that creative outlet?

You can be relatively anonymous in the crowd here where people won't find you unless they look for you, but if you're concerned about what family members might do if they do stumble upon you, either be content sanitizing this aspect of your life, or remain anonymous until their opinions can no longer hold sway over you.
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:iconoinari-hime:
Oinari-Hime Featured By Owner Apr 17, 2012  Professional Digital Artist
It is a difficult decision to make and so for the time being I shall remain anon until I can either choose or cope with the consequences.
Thank you very much for your input ♥
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:iconsrsmith:
SRSmith Featured By Owner Apr 17, 2012   Writer
Difficult decisions are best not made hastily. When you know what the right answer is, you can do that, but you'll know when you know.
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:iconcombatplayer:
combatplayer Featured By Owner Apr 14, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
well that isnt something i can tell you based on that information.. are you gay yourself? or do you just like to watch male gay parings? or are you maybe completely asexual like many people nowadays. and what is your family like? religious? if so how seriously? do you live with them or something? a lot of generally pretty basic information. these things and many more are things id need to know to give you advise on what to do other than my personal opinion.

and my personal opinion is pretty much just, be yourself.
don't be what others want you to be because you fear their reaction. i'm a giant hypocrite for saying this because i don't follow this at all. but it's still my opinion.
only you can make your life what you want it to be, you can keep that part of you that likes yaoi and such as a pure online identity with no face or personal detail for anyone other than the ones you trust the most, or you can take and bring it out from here, making it your real life, at whatever cost it may have. i think it all boils down to your personal preferences and what you really want.
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:iconoinari-hime:
Oinari-Hime Featured By Owner Apr 15, 2012  Professional Digital Artist
I'm not gay myself, I cant even remember how I got into yaoi so long ago. Its not that I like yaoi per se but rather the dramatic and romantic 'universe' it always falls under. As I told *tsatsuke in a note "I craved yaoi because it showed love, something which until recently I had no knowledge of and desperately sought. Even more so it was forbidden love which made it all the more exciting. It was my fix like any old drug, my coping mechanism. I think in part that its my realization of this that has also brought about this shame. I have gay friends, even a family member that's gay and if I honestly had to go talk to my family about this I know that they wouldn't banish or shun me in any way because of it. Its my dependence upon it and cowardly way of living that I don't want them to see. I don't wish to ruin the perfect image they have of me."

And so I agree with what you said and I'm going to try my best to be myself, but the current me doesn't care much for yaoi. The fanfic I mentioned is an old project of mine, the characters don't even kiss, though I will feel bad about the people who were following it on fanfaction.net so perhaps I'll just try to neatly wrap it up and have them live happily ever after.

Thank you so very much for your encouraging words and support! I'll do my best to be the best me there is! ♥
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:iconcombatplayer:
combatplayer Featured By Owner Apr 15, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
if theres no need to hide it other than their "perfect view" of you, then dont hide. the only thing thats a perfect view of you is the view thats the real you. and if they will even accept you as such, then go for it ^^
its way harder than it sounds, i know that. but still.

i can easily see why you like yaoi based on that, i like that about it too, but i still feel unpleasant when i see two guys or two girls kissing etc. probably scars from the past tainting me lol.

i just hope it all goes well for you. also just fyi, the best you there is, is the only real you there is.
and i think you will find love soon. so you dont need to worry about that.
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:iconoinari-hime:
Oinari-Hime Featured By Owner Apr 15, 2012  Professional Digital Artist
"the best you there is, is the only real you there is" wise words!
Truly, thank you for all the support and comfort, it really helps and I hope that your wounds will one day heal as well ♥
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:iconcombatplayer:
combatplayer Featured By Owner Apr 15, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
if you ever need something i'm always around ^^
need someone to talk to or just want to say hi, i'm always up for a chat ^^

take care of yourself, and good luck with it all. ^^
Reply
:icontsatsuke:
Tsatsuke Featured By Owner Apr 14, 2012  Student General Artist
DeviantArt is another life YOU yourself create

Some people run from the real life searching for a way to spread their own self and spirit somewhere like an illusion

like some of them live in a world that doesn't support their imagination,talent and skills

And one of them is me,nobody in my own region supports me,and why? because what I do isn't popular,for my culture and traditions..

When it comes to you,I've known somebody that is exactly like you,she was tortured by her family,not in a physical way,but in a strict way that everything is forbidden, banned to be happening for her

especially yaoi and these stuff,she used to find yaoi as a pleasure,watching it secretly,without anybody knowing,and used to draw yaoi too,traditionally and that was her mistake..

her family found out that she likes such gay things,thought that she herself turned gay because of all that matter,they took her things away from her,and she never logged in DeviantArt again..

But when it comes to her identity here,she told everybody about her real name,age,birth date and even siblings
She created her own world here...

If you want my advice,then I would advice you to stop drawing yaoi,and just be yourself,I know that it gives you a pleasure,but yaoi is an addiction,and if you do not stop now,you'll never stop~

Think of your future a little,about your studies if you attend a school or a collage,life can be really ugly sometimes,yet so beautiful in other times~

Your art is magnificent,gorgeous,very pretty and amazing~
use it to draw beautiful art as you always do,because you are blessed and talented,and not just drawing,writing too I guess,so create from these talents a whole new world of illustrations and imagination Because you can!

Shine! because you are the glittering star!~

And remember,even if you didn't show this side of you for the reality,you'll always feel that you want to show it,so all you have to do is show the good from it,and leave the bad aside,because nobody will accept you anymore if they dislike what you do and what is obviously wrong,inappropriate and abnormal.

People are created a male and a female,and the only relationship that could be is by these two,so they can keep the human being alive,as a life chain

So a man marries a woman and then they have a daughter and son,BUT when you think of a Man and a Man?!!
Something is so wrong! even if it's art! even if it's manga,or anime....

And even if it's a woman and a woman....So abnormal!?
think about it please~

I am one of the people that care about you,love you and wish you the best in life
Yet I'm against the same gender's relationships,because I find it way off,weird,abnormal,wrong and inappropriate

With lots of love,respect and gratitude~ :heart:
Aemi~ :)
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:iconcombatplayer:
combatplayer Featured By Owner Apr 14, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
before i say much here let it be known that i'm a lazy bastard and didn't read your whole thing, sorry about that.
i just read the ending of it and saw your opinion regarding same sex pairings. and wanted to ask you; do you believe in true love? if so, you should have an open enough mind to accept if that feeling of true love happens between two people of the same sex. sure it isn't how we are physically meant to be and it's weird compared to the general public. but does it really matter if the two really love each other? ^^

i'm not gay or bi, i'm just an open minded romantic, sorry if i said something stupid ^^'
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:icontsatsuke:
Tsatsuke Featured By Owner Apr 15, 2012  Student General Artist
You don't have to be sorry,and you said something quite great!

And you don't have to call yourself a bastard or lazy because I know most of the people won't read it~

I just wrote my opinion,and you wrote yours,so we are just sharing our opinions about the matter and discussing right? :)

When it comes to your opinion,I like it ^^ but there is always a limit...depending on the topic

And..if you want to talk about me,I am a Muslim,rather a whole lot of differences between us,and I have my own logic and the way I've been taught,and what my religion and culture believes in~

So,In Islam,my religion,such relationships are forbidden and is a great sin,and to my culture and country,it's an inappropriate manner and it's so rude.

So we can't really judge anything,while I have my own ideas and you have your own.

Love is a really pretty feeling,I can only share it with my mother,father,sisters and brothers,to my friends and the people who are very close to me,but in Islam,talking and going out (dating) a boy IS forbidden,until a good man,knocks the door asking the father to marry his daughter and then when the two of them sign as an engagement,then she is allowed to talk to him and to love him...etc as he is her husband


hoping that you understand my position,I just wrote my own opinion back then without being limited by my religion so I can share the GENERAL idea~ :)

Best of luck~
Have a nice day! :heart:
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:iconcombatplayer:
combatplayer Featured By Owner Apr 15, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
religion is a topic i rather not take the discussion up about lol.
i just think it's wrong that religion in this case is deciding stuff for you that is not something it should decide on.
that's just my opinion, don't mean to offend.

i can see how it makes your standpoint different though, i was personally brought up as christian, but i saw no point in weird rules and limitations based on a society that existed over 2000 years ago. they were sexist, racist and some just stupid. i didn't accept them and now i'm an atheist. i don't care if that gets me in some hell or something, but at least i can now freely enjoy my life as i wish to enjoy it while i have it. ^^

what happens afterwards only time will tell. if it's one of the most serious crimes to some god somewhere that i don't believe in him then that be it. i don't care, at least i can say that i spend most part of my life trying to make life better for others. if that's seen by a crime by others there's not much to do, but it isnt to me so i feel fine doing it.
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:icontsatsuke:
Tsatsuke Featured By Owner Apr 15, 2012  Student General Artist
Of course that's why I took the discussion in a general way without letting my religion's limitations interfere ...

And you don't offend me or my religion in any way,I guess that's just the way you express your opinion..

Christianity,when you get in the depth of it,you will see that it's somehow similar with Islam..

And when it comes to life,and life only,this differs in between these two religions because we Muslims believe that there is an other life after death and it contains heaven and hell

but Christians believe that there is no other life..

In this life we are living in,we are created by our god,Allah to worship him and only him,and there is nothing other than that,we have to be good people to ourselves and to others even if they're not Muslims.

We do good things,donate and give things to poor people,we fast in a holy month that we call Ramadan and this is a way to have the feeling of poor people that are starving..

We give Zakah and it's donating but it has limitation and it must be once each year..

We adopt orphans and give them what they need,and even if you think that a religion can stop you from being free,there will always be something in you that tells you what's wrong and what's right

so let this conversation end,since it's not a forum so we can discuss our opinions in =-="" it's somebody's journal you know :)

So if you want to replay,do note me ^^,or just a comment on my page~
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:icontentacles-ri:
tentacles-ri Featured By Owner Apr 5, 2012
Hmmm, let people know, but say if they don't like what you've told them is in in it, not to view.
Then those genuinely interested can see c:
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:iconoinari-hime:
Oinari-Hime Featured By Owner Apr 7, 2012  Professional Digital Artist
You make it sound so easy, but then again I suppose it really is that plain and simple xD I'm just so afraid people will see the real me and not like me >.<
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:icontentacles-ri:
tentacles-ri Featured By Owner Apr 7, 2012
Hmmm, well, you could always just ask people to note you for the link : )
Then if there are people you don't want to see it, wont |D
But I'm sure people wont stop liking you because of it <3
If it's a part of who you are they should still like you all the same c:
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:iconoinari-hime:
Oinari-Hime Featured By Owner Apr 12, 2012  Professional Digital Artist
Thank you for all your wise words. It is difficult, but I suppose I should simply bite the bullet rather than trying to live two lives. >n<
Thanks :heart:
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:icontentacles-ri:
tentacles-ri Featured By Owner Apr 12, 2012
Wish you luck c: <33
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